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Feeling so emo. Today is the most emo day of my life.

Everything is meaningless. Friends come and go. All good things must come to an end. Good memories fade. Bad memories haunt.
People. It's always about pleasing the people.
Who am I? Am I who I think I am?
Anmesia, what an interesting thought. Always wished I could experience it.

Why am I so emo. Recalled my verse for this year. Which I have chosen last year dec.

Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come and the year approach when you will say, "I find no pleasure in them"
Ecclesiastes 12:1.

How apt it is now that I look back. I would never have known how emo I would be this year. I chose this verse thinking that it would apply to me when I go into the army.

8 months have past. Not in the army yet. Retain. @#&* I hate school. I hate being in a faculty with over 500 students and not knowing a single soul.
Interesting fact of the day. I've uttered less than maybe 30 minutes of speech in school this year. Pathetic me.

I hate having to laugh all the time, even when I dont feel like it. Someone asks. 'Joel are you sad?' Someone else butts in 'Joel sad?! That has gotta be the joke of the century!' and everyone laughs. Shut up man. You don't know me.

No one does. No one except God. Not my parents.
You think I very happy that I retain? You think I enjoy telling people I'm still in poly? Stop lecturing me about the past. I got 87 for term test still come and scold me. What more do you want from me? I learnt my mistake and moved on. Why can't you?

Lots of other things. But I shall give my heavy heart a rest. Too much emoness can kill. =x

As I've said before. Feeling very emo. Gotta sort everything out. I'll be fine. Don't sweat it. Hah. This year is emo year. Verse of the year how apt indeed.





The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

He restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

Lesson learnt! Never eat 2 slices of coffee flavored cake for supper before you sleep! Been lying in bed for the past 3 hours. Can't even get a wink of sleep, the caffeine is messing with my brain. It's 2.50am now. Haha.

The last post was done by Melissa, well sort of. So I shall officially start my blogging about tapestry now. (:

While I was lying in bed, I was thinking about loads of stuff. Well, mainly it's about tapestry. Felt a little sad that it was over. Also felt quite disappointed that I didn't do so well. Lots of 'what-ifs' flew into my mind. Thinking about people who told me well done, good job. When I know I didn't do well. I screwed up quite a lot. Haha.

But what's over is over. No use looking back. And our main objective like what Matt blogged is achieved. In our own weaknesses, God's power is amplified. Praise the Lord!

I saw lots of friends of our youth there, lots of passerbys. We will never know how well we have done in aiding these lost souls to Christ. Only God knows, and our deeds will not go unnoticed. Glory be to God!

Looking towards the future. I should really brush up on my technical skills. In drumming and in doing sound. Felt bad that The Raptured didn't do so well cuz of sound problems. I admit that I only know the bare minimum needed to do sound. As long as got sound can liao. Haha. So gotta learn more about sound. And drums too. I'm not good at all, it's truely by God's grace that I can play for God. So I should train more and give my best to Him. Be a good steward, multiply my gifts and mentor people. Lots of stuff to do. Keep my mind away from tapestry hangover. Haha.

Lots of people feeling emo at the moment. Maybe it's due to tapestry hangover, maybe it's personal problems. Emo. Nothing wrong with being emo. Read Ecclesiastes, it's like the most emo book in the whole Bible. Even King Solomon the wisest guy on Earth also feels emo. So you guys ain't the only ones. Feeling better now? Haha. (:

Running out of things to say. Yet the caffeine isn't wearing out. Still wide awake at 3.15am. What shall I do? Dang... =x

Lets do 'thank you's since everyone is doing that now. Hah.
In order of priority.

God - Thank God for making tapestry two006 happen! Lots of people had spiritual attacks, crazy stuff happening to them. Thank God for keeping everyone safe and sound till the day of the performance. And also thank God for the weather. I'll never forget the 'kwa kwa' band and the rain came. Haha. We prayed and when it was our turn the rain stopped. Thank God. (:

My parents, and all the parents of the tapestry members - Lets face it. EVERYONE's parents were pissed at us. Lets not deny it. Haha. If I were my own parent I would be pissed too. Going to church almost everyday until 10 plus 11pm to practice for some event that I do not know a slightest thing about. And for some people, having to see grades drop and seeing school work being affected by this tapestry. Thus, I thank all the parents for being so so patient with us. And thank you, well some of you, for coming down to support us. To see the fruit of all our hardwork and understanding why we were willing to sacrifice so much to see God's work being done. Thank you (:

Auntie Karen, Uncle Wee Khoon and Auntie Mary - Thanks to all of you. For always being there to support us. Giving us encouragement when we feel down and talking to some of the grumpy parents. hehe =P.

F.O.G - Thanks for being such a great team.
Well done Marcus, band leader, you really did well in gathering the band together in unity and in love. Not compromising God for more practice time and stuff like that.
Julian too, you were really great. It has been hard on you aye? Having to play for both teams, I play for 1 team I also wanna die liao. Haha.
Nic, the most technically proficient amongst us all. Haha. Thank you for coming to play even tho u have army and all those marathon trainings and u are trying your hardest to get that free driving license. Haha. Will be praying for u (:
Jimmy, the cd-player. You were great man. Thank God your back healed in time for tapestry.
Joesph and rachel, Nice vocals yeah.

The Raptured. - You guys were great man. Matthias good job! Thank God! (:

XX - Thanks for coming down for all the practices, it has been hard on you.

Sam Leo - Thanks for the T-Shirt! Absolutely love it!

Marcus - Thanks to marcus again. This time for being the photographer and painstakenly uploading all 500 of his photos into the net. Not funny man. Up till now he still havent upload finish I think. Haha.

Oh yeah almost forgot. Thanks everyone for making my birthday such a memorable one. All the gifts and smses and crazy stuff. Thanks so much. (:


What else can I say? I'm trying to beat the world record in longest blog post ever. Haha. Man... I still don't feel tired. And it's 3.40am now. Haha.

Well. The last time I replied to my tags was 4 Jul 06, 11:20. Yup. Quite long ago. So I shall not attempt to reply to all my tags here. As it would be redundant to do so. Haha. Lazy la. =P

Starting to feel a little weary. Is this it?! My time of rest has finally come. Oh... Thank you Lord! Haha. I can finally go to sleep. Good nite! Heh (:

Tapestry was cool. really cool. hahahaha. i dare say we did quite well. all by God's grace. i'm glad that eveything went well. though the sound system was horrible, its the heart that counts right?
i'm sure God is smiling up there. and i know that those non believers out on the street who heard our music were touched. it was a really a test of faith for many of us. for example a few of us fell sick and lost stuff. it even threatened to rain and cancel our slots. blah blah, i don't know already. hahaha.

i was really shocked and touched when matthias gave me a shoutout. and i want to thank all those who made my birthday so memorable with all the little gifts, smses, cards, wishes and all. i really appreciate it

overall, i will never forget all the fun times we had. i thank God for all the wonderful friends He has placed in my life.


Anyway that was Melissa helping me blog. Yup. (:
Too lazy to think. Having hangover from Tapestry. Bah.

Adios~

Yo guys! Been snooping around YouTube and found these 2 cool vids. Lionel may be interested in them eh? Haha...

This is a vid of a bald guy playing bass. Nothing interesting right? But his right hand has been amputated. So he's playing it only using 1 hand. Haha. Nice.



And this vid is a song, with only the bass playing. Sounds unique. Haha.

Just watched this Channel U documentary, about how this man had a goal at the age of 13 and it changed his life.

He was a poor student in class, but after reading a self-improvement book it changed him. He made a goal to be a millionaire by the age of 26, and by being focused and determined he hit his target and was successful.

That made me think. Up till now, I have no goals, no plans for the future, no nothing. Just living each day as it passes, aimlessly. So I have decided to set goals for myself and I do not know what to aim for. So I just made a really general one, how -____- right? Haha.

When I'm 28 years old, I want to look back at my life and have no regrets at all.

How general can I get. Haha.
Off to sleep. Good nite! (:

Yesterday was eventful. Too lazy to blog in detail.

- Played for main service, I sucked big time. Hah.
- Had team 2 and tapestry practice. Quite sian.
- Stuck in the lift with Marcus, Matthias, Sam Wong, Shawn, Evelyn and Elaine. Hot but fun.
- Took a cab to Suntec with Asriel, Sam Wong, Lionel and Julian. Julian hiding in a corner cuz the uncle won't let the 5 of us in. The blur guy, didn't even notice Jul was in the cab. Haha.
- Sam Goh treated Pizza Hut for dinner. Thanks man.
- Went to Marcus's house with Sam Goh to watch some YouTube before the match.
- Went to Mabel's house to watch World Cup! Sam Wong cycled all the way here to join us.
- Was a 'different experience' watching soccer with a bunch of non-soccer people. Haha. Racist non-soccer people to boot.
- ITALY WON! Yessssssssss. Danced around like a mad man. Everyone else who supported France was speechless.
- A bunch of them watched Jackass the movie. I didn't find it very edifying. Disgusting altho some were quite funny. So went to sleep.

Fun day. Another 4 more years. Can't wait to see what happens in World Cup 2010 Africa!

Had the worst night in my life yesterday. Food poisoning.
Vomited 5 times, all my dinner came out. Noodles, unagi bento set. Everything.
Then came the stomach cramps, and toilet trips. Not fun at all.
Didn't get to sleep much, maybe an hour plus?

Thank God I was healed when morning came! Woke up at 4am feeling really thirsty, went to drink ALOT of water then went back to sleep. Woke up at 11 feeling fresh and healthy again. Haha. Praise the Lord! His mercy endures forever! Amen! (:

Went to watch superman returns with some of the youths. A pretty nice show. I'll give it like a 3.5 out of 5? Check out the Christianity references man.

"Even though you've been raised as a human being, you're not one of them. They can be a great people, Kal-El. They wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all - their capacity for good - I have sent them you... my only son." - By superman's dad.

After that, went to church for tapestry practice, I thought it was quite ok. But was too tired to do anything.

I'm practically konking out in front of my com. My eyes are closing on me. I gotta go sleep. Ciao~

I'm really fuming mad now. Stupid Argentina coach. Dunno what the heck he doing. Where did he leave his brains? At home is it? Wah lau eh...

What was he thinking when he replaced both Riquelme and Crespo when he knows that not only has his keeper been substituted also, but also that his 0-1 lead is just so fragile.

Doesn't he know that from statistics, most of the knock-out games in World Cup have goals scored in the final minutes? Doesn't he know that he have to pile up the pressure to kill off the game?

Why substitute his best player on the pitch? Why substitute his target man? Giving Germany the impression that Argentina is going to lay back and soak the pressure, which Germany gladly accept the offer and came in waves and waves of attack until the Argentina defence crumble.

What the heck is the Argentina coach thinking?! Replacing Crespo with some Julio Cruz guy instead of Leo Messi?

GAH!

Stupid Goal keeper, getting himself injured needlessly like that. Stupid referee siding with the Germans. Sad day for all Argentina fans. On the brink of tears. T___T


EDIT :: I've been reading other people's blogs while trying to get my mind off the incompetence of the Argentian coach, and I guess I have opened up pandora's box with my previous post. Now I have absolutely no idea what is going to happen now. Well at least one thing is for sure. People do know what is going on, they see the ugly side of all this and I'm not the only one feeling this way. Go figure.

I'm off to sleep, dreaming about what could've happen if I was the Argentina coach. Hah. Most probably we would win, or maybe not. If it's gonna be a nightmare. (:




"Woe to me!" I cried. "I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty."

Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. With it he touched my mouth and said, "See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for."
Isaiah 6:5-7




Take me in to the Holy of Holies
Take me in by the blood of the Lamb
Take me in to the Holy of Holies
Take the coal, touch my lips, here I am